Lidiya's Lucky Charm

The morning had got off to a sluggish start. The day lay stretched in front of her like a blank slate. Lidiya wondered how she was going to fill in those long hours and wished her friend hadn't stood her up the very last minute. They had planned to catch the matinee at the local theater and now that the plan had fallen through, she suddenly found herself alone and feeling rather petulant. She could go by herself, she mulled for a while but the movies aren't much fun alone now, are they? And so she wandered around the house aimlessly before settling on her bed staring at the peeling walls.

The eerie stillness of the house broken only by the ticking of the wall clock was impetus enough to get her off the bed.

'There's got to be something to do' she thought hard.

She stood in front of her dresser and felt she could get useful and tidy the drawers. But the very thought of squatting in front of her dresser and sorting the confused pile of paper and forgotten items made her heart sink further. But it had to be done someday and today was perfect so she switched on some music, poured herself some wine, took a deep breath and pulled open the bottom drawer.

A thick musty smell of wood, and decaying paper filled the room. She peered inside, covering her nose and narrowed her eyes. Stacks of old cards, stamps, address books, letters scrawled in broken handwriting in ink, the ink now blotting the paper in places stared at her in neglect. She picked up an old card and wiped the dust that had come to stick to it over the months. It was from an old friend, who she had lost touch with. She tossed it to one side not caring to renew her lost friendship. There was a jumble of old warranty papers, receipts of electronic items, and such like. Most of which was of no use to her. She made 2 piles - one for items she would keep and one for those she would discard.

As the 'to be discarded' pile grew bigger, she decided to pull everything out and trash it in the bin without surveying each piece of yellowed paper. 'What a waste of time that would be!' So she pulled out another heap and tossed it carelessly. She dug her hands further into the drawer for another pile and felt something unusual; soft and spongy. Startled, she withdrew her hand and wondered what it could be. A dead rat? Horrified she got a flash light and directed it in the corner, her eyes wide with curiosity.

A little doll no bigger than her palm in a black cape, a red scarf and bright blue eyes shone in the white light. There was a ladder tied to his back and a little piece of paper stuck to his front that read 'I'll be your lucky charm and not bring you to any harm.' She took it in her hand and stared. It took her to a faraway place in a distant time. Wrapping her fingers around it, she gave it a gentle squeeze and wondered where she might be and what might have become of her?

It had been a glorious day, she remembered. The house smelt of cupcakes, wine flowed freely and music played softly in the background drowned by the happy chatter of her mother's friends. She was in the lawn that smelt of freshly cut grass watching the clouds drift and form funny shapes when she heard them leave. She raised herself on her elbow and watched them languidly as they got in their cars. It was then that one of her mother's friends, a radiant smile on her face approached her. She sat up and gave a half smile. 'How are you dear?' said the woman. 'Here, I want you to have this' and saying so she thrust a little doll in her palm, closing it with her manicured hand. 'It will bring you luck. Keep it with you.' She smiled and walked away.

Lidiya watched the retreating figure, puzzled at the unexpected gesture of affection. She toyed with the little figure in her hands and decided to give it to her friend, Anna, who she was visiting that evening. She had always wanted to give her something as a token of her friendship. ‘This will do’ she thought out aloud.

But when she went over to Anna’s place that evening, it was teeming with youngsters her age. This wasn't how she had anticipated the evening. She was hoping for a quiet evening with just the two of them – a more private moment to give her the doll, the 'Lucky Charm'. She sat self-consciously on the edge of the sofa feeling very out of her depth. She didn't know anyone. It was a boisterous crowd, very self-assured and loud. She wondered who they were and looked anxiously for Anna, who was talking animatedly to two other boys. She smiled at the girl sitting opposite who looked coldly at her. She felt lonely and wished she was back in her lawn; the heady smell of cut grass and Earth, the buzzing of dragonflies with the wind in her face.

She tried to fit in but found acceptance hard to come by. Feeling confused, she sat by herself in a corner. It wasn’t long before she noticed a girl, a waif of a thing, sitting cross legged on the floor in the dark balcony by the far end of the room. The little girl looked on, eyes wide, at the unruly crowd of girls and boys. Next to her sat a woman, perhaps her mother. One could tell from their appearance that they were probably the domestic help. Lidiya’s heart went out to them. They didn’t speak a word but you could tell they drew comfort from each other. There was a sense of calm about them. Lidiya watched them, especially the little girl in her tiny plait that tapered to dry scraggly strands of hair. She wore a white frock with pink motifs, which was a ‘hand-me-down’ from Anna. Her mother was in her torn work clothes and looked disheveled but had a pleasant countenance. Lidiya wondered if they had been offered any refreshments at all and felt terrible.

Minutes passed when the clamor in the room was abruptly stilled when someone suggested they play a game. Everyone started throwing ideas. It was finally decided that they would play ‘dark room’, where everyone hides and one person looks for them in the dark. While they were deciding who would seek them out first, Anna’s mother very graciously asked the little servant girl to join in the game. Everyone looked at her. She shrank under their stares, petrified. Lidiya felt her discomfort at being singled out as she emerged clumsily from the safety of the shadows. She wanted to take her by the hand and make her feel wanted. Her mother sensing her fear patted her on the shoulders. The little girl came closer and stood on the fringes of the group maintaining her distance; indicative of her lower social-economic status.

And so began the game. They chose the person who would seek them out first and turned off the lights. There was utter chaos as everyone tried to find the best hiding place. Lidiya managed to hide behind a closet and thought of the little girl. She peeled her eyes in the darkness for any hint of her but the pitch black room reflected no light, no shadows or silhouettes. She waited with bated breath. The eerie silence was suddenly interrupted by a small shriek. It was the little girl. The seeker had bumped right into her, who hadn't moved an inch.

On came the lights and there she stood, transfixed, looking scared and sheepish. ‘Apparently, she didn’t hide!’ said someone and laughed. It was a funny sight but given it was the poor hapless girl, Lidiya felt indignant. Others laughed, some mocked while she stood staring at the floor, shamefaced. Someone shoved her and said ‘Well, it’s your turn to seek us out. Get ready.’

Lidiya, overcome by the insensitivity of her peers and the helplessness on the little girl’s part, suddenly shouted over the din and said ‘I will fill in for her.’ Everyone turned towards her. She felt bold and fearless much to her surprise. The little girl looked at her with those familiar wide eyes. Lidiya walked to the door and shut it. Never had she felt this confident, this excited, this strong. She loved the feeling. The game carried on for another half hour after which the crowd started to disperse.

Lidiya changed her mind and decided to give the ‘Lucky Charm’ to the little girl, for she liked her. She rummaged in her pockets but couldn't find it. She looked frantically all over but in vain. She had lost her ‘Lucky Charm’ in the chaos of the evening! ‘Oh no!’ She felt torn, not because she had lost the doll but because she couldn't give it to the little girl.

Weeks passed and memories of that evening faded. Lidiya thought often of the little girl in the beginning but forgot about her as days went by.

Until one day.

It was a hot summer evening. Anna’s mother had invited Lidiya and her mom over for tea. They were gossiping over scones and sponge cake when someone knocked on the door. It was the little girl with her mother. Memories of that evening came flooding back and Lidiya wished she had given the little girl something and not lost that doll. She felt torn again.

After an hour or so of chatting, Anna got up to go to the restroom. Lidiya sat alone in the room when suddenly the little girl walked in. ‘I want you to have this’ she said shyly and placed the ‘Lucky Charm’ in her hands. Lidiya stared at it in disbelief. ‘Anna’s mother found it the day after the party and didn’t know whose it was. So she gave it to me. I always wanted to give it to you. I waited for us to be alone so I could give it to you. You were kind to me. Thank you’ she said timidly. Lidiya caught by surprise could only manage a watery smile.

They heard Anna's hurried footsteps in the corridor. Startled, the little girl made for the door leaving behind a speechless Lidiya.